In addition to Child Identification, we here at Ident-A-Kid are concerned with the safety of children and adults across the world. Below is some information from www.charitynavigator.org about the disaster in Haiti.
On January 12th a 7.0 earthquake hit Haiti's capital, Port-Au-Prince and caused massive devastation to the city. The death toll is expected to be well in the thousands and a massive response by government agencies and non-profits has already begun. Below are a few 3 and 4-star charities from Charitynavigator.org that are responding to the crisis along with a synopsis of their plans. Each of these charities has a history of working on massive disasters and/or of working in Haiti.
• American Red Cross - The ARC is sending tarps, hygiene items and cooking sets for approximately 5,000 families and is helping the injured who may need blood. Thousands of local Red Cross volunteers are already aiding their fellow Haitians and ARC Disaster management specialists are scheduled to be on the ground soon.
• Americares - Sending $5 million of medical aid to survivors including antibiotics, pain relievers, bandages and medical supplies for survivors with trauma injuries.
• CARE - Deploying emergency team members to Port-au-Prince and will be distributing food. Over 100 staff members on the ground coordinating with U.N. agencies.
• Convoy of Hope - Setting up an emergency command center just outside Port-au-Prince where food, water and supplies are being distributed.
• Direct Relief International - Arranging an emergency airlift containing over $2 million in medicines and medical supplies that will depart on January 15.
• Doctors Without Borders - Currently treating people on the ground and will be operating an inflatable hospital.
• Food for the Poor - Accepting cash donations, canned eats, fish, condensed/evaporated/powdered milk, and water. Almost 100 containers of urgently needed medical supplies, rice and canned food from Food For The Poor are ready to be distributed to the people of Haiti. Another 300 containers are planned as a part of the initial relief effort.
• Partners in Health - Has been working in Haiti for 20 years. They are organizing medical personnel volunteers and gathering supplies.
• Save the Children - Has worked in Haiti for 25 years with 100 staff on the ground. Will be providing food, water, shelter and child-friendly spaces. Because Save the Children's offices did not suffer the structural damage of other non-governmental organizations, other aid workers have taken refuge in the agency's compound, where operations are being run out of offices and tents.
• Water Missions International -Raising funds so they can directly provide safe water to earthquake survivors. Has full-time staff on the ground in Port-au-Prince and are poised to respond as quickly as possible to the survivors of the quake.
Of course, these are just a few of the many charities offering aid. For other options for your philanthropic investment, please refer to our extended list of highly-rated charities below.
Tips For Funding Haiti Earthquake Relief Efforts
Avoid Newly-Formed Charities and Give To An Established Charity That Has Worked In Haiti - Establishing a new charity is hard enough, but in a crisis, the odds of succeeding are slim to none. Think of it this way: would you entrust all your savings in a financial firm that just opened, doesn't even have stationery, and whose employees have no experience in investing money? Doubtful. Find a charity with a proven track record of success in providing disaster relief and one that has worked in Haiti. Start with the list of charities below and if a group you are considering supporting isn’t there, then take the time to thoroughly research it before making a gift.
Do Not Give To The Haitian Government – Haiti is known to be a corrupt country. And news reports post earthquake indicate that the government is pretty much not functioning. If that isn’t enough reason not to give directly to the Haiti government, then consider the fact that contributions to foreign governments are not tax deductible.
Designate Your Investment – Generally, it is best to trust your chosen charity to spend your donation as it sees fit. But with disaster related giving, you should specify that you want your donation only used to respond to this particular crisis.
Do Not Send Supplies – Knowing that millions of people are desperately in need of food and water, it is hard not to want to pack up a box of supplies and send it to Haiti. But this type of philanthropy is simply not practical or efficient. Even if mail could get to Haiti, no one is set up to receive these goods, much less organize and distribute them to the victims. Furthermore, charities are often able to partner with companies to acquire large amounts of in-kind donations such as bottled water and new clothing. Instead of boxing up and sending your old clothing, have a garage sale and turn your used goods into cash and donate that to a worthy charity.
Be Careful Of Email Solicitations
Be Leery Of People That Contact You Online Claiming To Be A Victim – Unless you personally know someone in Haiti, anyone alleging to be in this position is most likely part of a scam. Obviously, people affected by the earthquake are in no position to contact you directly for assistance.
Delete Unsolicited Emails With Attachments - Never respond to unsolicited emails. Do not open any attachments to these emails even if they claim to contain pictures from Haiti. These attachments are probably viruses.
Seek Out The Charity’s Authorized Website
Is it safe to make a text donation? - So long as you do your homework, yes.
Consider The Nature Of The Charity’s Work – Not every charity is responding in the same way. Some are providing medical assistance, some shelter, some food and water. Others will be more focused on either short term or long term rebuilding efforts. And some are just helping to fundraise for other nonprofits. Think about what it is you want your philanthropic investment to accomplish and then take the time to find the charities doing that work.
Be Inspired By Social Media, But Still Do Your Homework – Social networking tools like Twitter, Facebook, YouTube and blogs are delivering heart-wrenching images and information about Haiti to our computers and phones. Many of them include pleas to donate. While these tools can be a powerful tool to inspire your desire to help, you should not blindly give via these vehicles. You must take the time to investigate the groups behind such pleas for help to ensure that it comes from a legitimate nonprofit. For example, you can donate $10 to the American Red Cross by texting “Haiti” to 90999. As of today, this tool has raised tens of millions for the Haiti earthquake relief efforts.
Avoid Telemarketers – As always, hang up the phone do your homework and give directly to a charity.
Do Not Expect Immediate Results, But Do Keep Tabs On What Your Donation Accomplishes- It takes time for charities to mobilize, to assess the problems that need to be addressed and to develop effective solutions. Donors need to be patient so charities will not feel pressured to plunge in and offer ineffective aid, simply to placate impatient donors. That doesn't mean donors shouldn't hold the charities accountable for delivering on their promises! Be sure to follow up with the charity in a few months to find out (a) how your donation was put to use and (b) if the organization needs additional support to complete the recovery effort.
Charities Providing Relief in Haiti Overall Rating
Action Against Hunger-USA
ActionAid International USA
ADRA
American Jewish World Service
AmeriCares
Beyond Borders
Bright Hope International
CARE
CHF International
Childcare Worldwide
Compassion International
Convoy of Hope
CRISTA Ministries
Cross International
Direct Relief International
Doctors Without Borders, USA
Episcopal Relief and Development
Feed My Starving Children
FINCA International
Food for the Hungry
Food For The Poor
Friends of the World Food Program
Giving Children Hope
Global Aid Network
Globus Relief
Haitian Health Foundation
Hands Together
Hope for Haiti
Hope for Haiti Children's Center
International Orthodox Christian Charities
International Relief Teams
International Rescue Committee
Islamic Relief USA
K.I.D.S.
Kids Alive International
Lions Clubs International Foundation
Love A Child, Inc.
MADRE
MAP International
Medical Benevolence Foundation
Medical Teams International
MedShare International
Operation USA
Oxfam America
Partners In Health
Physicians for Peace
Project HOPE
The Resource Foundation
Saint Boniface Haiti Foundation
Samaritan's Purse
Save the Children
United Methodist Committee on Relief
United States Fund for UNICEF
Water Missions International
William J. Clinton Foundation
World Help
World Hope International
World Neighbors
World Vision
American Red Cross
American Refugee Committee International
Fonkoze USA
Grant Foundation
Heifer Project International
International Medical Corps
The Lambi Fund of Haiti
Lutheran World Relief
Mercy Corps
National Disaster Search Dog Foundation
Plan USA
Project C.U.R.E.
Project Concern International
World Relief
To view the source of this article or to find out more about charities for Haiti, please visit www.charitynavigator.org
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Disaster Preparedness
In addition to Child Identification, we here at Ident-A-Kid are also concerned with you and your family’s well being. With the disaster happening in Haiti, it brings to mind many concerns about disaster preparedness. Is your family prepared for a natural or man-made disaster? Below are some recommended items for an emergency kit and some emergency plans, from www.ready.gov, that you and your family can implement in order to try to stay as safe as possible in the event of a disaster.
You may need to survive on your own after an emergency. This means having your own food, water, and other supplies in sufficient quantity to last for at least three days. Local officials and relief workers will be on the scene after a disaster, but they cannot reach everyone immediately. You could get help in hours, or it might take days. In addition, basic services such as electricity, gas, water, sewage treatment, and telephones may be cut off for days, or even a week or longer.
Recommended Items to Include in a Basic Emergency Supply Kit:
• Water, one gallon of water per person per day for at least three days, for drinking and sanitation
• Food, at least a three-day supply of non-perishable food
• Battery-powered or hand crank radio and a NOAA Weather Radio with tone alert and extra batteries for both
• Flashlight and extra batteries
• First aid kit
• Whistle to signal for help
• Dust mask, to help filter contaminated air and plastic sheeting and duct tape to shelter-in-place
• Moist towelettes, garbage bags and plastic ties for personal sanitation
• Wrench or pliers to turn off utilities
• Can opener for food (if kit contains canned food)
• Local maps
• Cell phone with chargers
• Your Ident-A-Kid Child Identification Cards
Additional Items to Consider Adding to an Emergency Supply Kit:
• Prescription medications and glasses
• Infant formula and diapers
• Pet food and extra water for your pet
• Important family documents such as copies of insurance policies, identification and bank account records in a waterproof, portable container
• Cash or traveler's checks and change
• Emergency reference material such as a first aid book or information from www.ready.gov
• Sleeping bag or warm blanket for each person. Consider additional bedding if you live in a cold-weather climate.
• Complete change of clothing including a long sleeved shirt, long pants and sturdy shoes. Consider additional clothing if you live in a cold-weather climate.
• Household chlorine bleach and medicine dropper – When diluted nine parts water to one part bleach, bleach can be used as a disinfectant. Or in an emergency, you can use it to treat water by using 16 drops of regular household liquid bleach per gallon of water. Do not use scented, color safe or bleaches with added cleaners.
• Fire Extinguisher
• Matches in a waterproof container
• Feminine supplies and personal hygiene items
• Mess kits, paper cups, plates and plastic utensils, paper towels
• Paper and pencil
• Books, games, puzzles or other activities for children
Find out how to keep food safe during and after and emergency by visiting: http://www.foodsafety.gov/keep/
Your family may not be together when disaster strikes, so it is important to plan in advance: how you will contact one another; how you will get back together; and what you will do in different situations.
Family Emergency Plan
• Identify an out-of town contact. It may be easier to make a long-distance phone call than to call across town, so an out-of-town contact may be in a better position to communicate among separated family members.
• Be sure every member of your family knows the phone number and has a cell phone, coins, or a prepaid phone card to call the emergency contact. If you have a cell phone, program that person(s) as "ICE" (In Case of Emergency) in your phone. If you are in an accident, emergency personnel will often check your ICE listings in order to get a hold of someone you know. Make sure to tell your family and friends that you’ve listed them as emergency contacts.
• Teach family members how to use text messaging (also knows as SMS or Short Message Service). Text messages can often get around network disruptions when a phone call might not be able to get through.
• Subscribe to alert services. Many communities now have systems that will send instant text alerts or e-mails to let you know about bad weather, road closings, local emergencies, etc.
Planning to Stay or Go
Depending on your circumstances and the nature of the emergency, the first important decision is whether you stay where you are or evacuate. You should understand and plan for both possibilities. Use common sense and available information, including what you are learning here, to determine if there is an immediate danger. In any emergency, local authorities may or may not immediately be able to provide information on what is happening and what you should do. However, you should watch TV, listen to the radio or check the Internet often for information or official instruction as it becomes available.
Emergency Information
Find out what kinds of disasters, both natural and man-made, are most likely to occur in your area and how you will be notified. Methods of getting your attention vary from community to community. One common method is to broadcast via emergency radio and TV broadcasts. You might hear a special siren, or get a telephone call, or emergency workers may go door-to-door.
Emergency Plans
Use the New Online Family Emergency Planning Tool created by the Ready Campaign in conjunction with the Ad Council to prepare a printable Comprehensive Family Emergency Plan:
http://ready.adcouncil.org/beprepared/fep/index.jsp
You may also want to inquire about emergency plans at places where your family spends time: work, daycare and school. If no plans exist, consider volunteering to help create one. Talk to your neighbors about how you can work together in the event of an emergency. You will be better prepared to safely reunite your family and loved ones during an emergency if you think ahead and communicate with others in advance.
Some of the things you can do to prepare for the unexpected, such as making an emergency supply kit and developing a family communications plan, are the same for both a natural or man-made emergency.
However, there are important differences among potential emergencies that will impact the decisions you make and the actions you take. Learn more about the potential emergencies that could happen where you live and the appropriate way to respond to them.
In addition, learn about the emergency plans that have been established in your area by your state and local government.
Emergency preparedness is no longer the sole concern of earthquake prone Californians and those who live in the part of the country known as "Tornado Alley." For Americans, preparedness must now account for man-made disasters as well as natural ones. Knowing what to do during an emergency is an important part of being prepared and may make all the difference when seconds count.
For more information, or to visit the source of this article, please visit: www.ready.gov
You may need to survive on your own after an emergency. This means having your own food, water, and other supplies in sufficient quantity to last for at least three days. Local officials and relief workers will be on the scene after a disaster, but they cannot reach everyone immediately. You could get help in hours, or it might take days. In addition, basic services such as electricity, gas, water, sewage treatment, and telephones may be cut off for days, or even a week or longer.
Recommended Items to Include in a Basic Emergency Supply Kit:
• Water, one gallon of water per person per day for at least three days, for drinking and sanitation
• Food, at least a three-day supply of non-perishable food
• Battery-powered or hand crank radio and a NOAA Weather Radio with tone alert and extra batteries for both
• Flashlight and extra batteries
• First aid kit
• Whistle to signal for help
• Dust mask, to help filter contaminated air and plastic sheeting and duct tape to shelter-in-place
• Moist towelettes, garbage bags and plastic ties for personal sanitation
• Wrench or pliers to turn off utilities
• Can opener for food (if kit contains canned food)
• Local maps
• Cell phone with chargers
• Your Ident-A-Kid Child Identification Cards
Additional Items to Consider Adding to an Emergency Supply Kit:
• Prescription medications and glasses
• Infant formula and diapers
• Pet food and extra water for your pet
• Important family documents such as copies of insurance policies, identification and bank account records in a waterproof, portable container
• Cash or traveler's checks and change
• Emergency reference material such as a first aid book or information from www.ready.gov
• Sleeping bag or warm blanket for each person. Consider additional bedding if you live in a cold-weather climate.
• Complete change of clothing including a long sleeved shirt, long pants and sturdy shoes. Consider additional clothing if you live in a cold-weather climate.
• Household chlorine bleach and medicine dropper – When diluted nine parts water to one part bleach, bleach can be used as a disinfectant. Or in an emergency, you can use it to treat water by using 16 drops of regular household liquid bleach per gallon of water. Do not use scented, color safe or bleaches with added cleaners.
• Fire Extinguisher
• Matches in a waterproof container
• Feminine supplies and personal hygiene items
• Mess kits, paper cups, plates and plastic utensils, paper towels
• Paper and pencil
• Books, games, puzzles or other activities for children
Find out how to keep food safe during and after and emergency by visiting: http://www.foodsafety.gov/keep/
Your family may not be together when disaster strikes, so it is important to plan in advance: how you will contact one another; how you will get back together; and what you will do in different situations.
Family Emergency Plan
• Identify an out-of town contact. It may be easier to make a long-distance phone call than to call across town, so an out-of-town contact may be in a better position to communicate among separated family members.
• Be sure every member of your family knows the phone number and has a cell phone, coins, or a prepaid phone card to call the emergency contact. If you have a cell phone, program that person(s) as "ICE" (In Case of Emergency) in your phone. If you are in an accident, emergency personnel will often check your ICE listings in order to get a hold of someone you know. Make sure to tell your family and friends that you’ve listed them as emergency contacts.
• Teach family members how to use text messaging (also knows as SMS or Short Message Service). Text messages can often get around network disruptions when a phone call might not be able to get through.
• Subscribe to alert services. Many communities now have systems that will send instant text alerts or e-mails to let you know about bad weather, road closings, local emergencies, etc.
Planning to Stay or Go
Depending on your circumstances and the nature of the emergency, the first important decision is whether you stay where you are or evacuate. You should understand and plan for both possibilities. Use common sense and available information, including what you are learning here, to determine if there is an immediate danger. In any emergency, local authorities may or may not immediately be able to provide information on what is happening and what you should do. However, you should watch TV, listen to the radio or check the Internet often for information or official instruction as it becomes available.
Emergency Information
Find out what kinds of disasters, both natural and man-made, are most likely to occur in your area and how you will be notified. Methods of getting your attention vary from community to community. One common method is to broadcast via emergency radio and TV broadcasts. You might hear a special siren, or get a telephone call, or emergency workers may go door-to-door.
Emergency Plans
Use the New Online Family Emergency Planning Tool created by the Ready Campaign in conjunction with the Ad Council to prepare a printable Comprehensive Family Emergency Plan:
http://ready.adcouncil.org/beprepared/fep/index.jsp
You may also want to inquire about emergency plans at places where your family spends time: work, daycare and school. If no plans exist, consider volunteering to help create one. Talk to your neighbors about how you can work together in the event of an emergency. You will be better prepared to safely reunite your family and loved ones during an emergency if you think ahead and communicate with others in advance.
Some of the things you can do to prepare for the unexpected, such as making an emergency supply kit and developing a family communications plan, are the same for both a natural or man-made emergency.
However, there are important differences among potential emergencies that will impact the decisions you make and the actions you take. Learn more about the potential emergencies that could happen where you live and the appropriate way to respond to them.
In addition, learn about the emergency plans that have been established in your area by your state and local government.
Emergency preparedness is no longer the sole concern of earthquake prone Californians and those who live in the part of the country known as "Tornado Alley." For Americans, preparedness must now account for man-made disasters as well as natural ones. Knowing what to do during an emergency is an important part of being prepared and may make all the difference when seconds count.
For more information, or to visit the source of this article, please visit: www.ready.gov
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Protect Your Child from Cyberbullying
In addition to Child Identification, we here at Ident-A-Kid are also concerned with your child’s physical and mental safety. Not only does Cyberbullying have potentially dangerous psychological implications for your child, but your child’s physical safety may become an issue as well. Bullies are notorious for tormenting their victims face to face—at school, on the playground, in sports. But now, cyberbullying (or online bullying) opens the door to 24-hour harassment through computers, cell phones, gaming consoles, or other Internet-enabled means. Below is some information from Microsoft.com and Symantec.com about Cyberbullying and how to stop it.
Talk with your kids about cyberbullying.
Ask your kids what they're doing online and encourage them to report bullying to you. Promise that you will take action on their behalf and explain what you will do. Reassure them that you won't curtail their phone or computer privileges.
Keep the family computer in a central location.
If your kids play video games, keep Internet-connected game consoles in a central location also. Teenagers have so many ways to access the Internet that putting the computer in a central spot isn't always effective. With older kids, it's especially important to have frank discussions.
Look for signs of online bullying.
For example, getting upset when online or a reluctance to go to school.
Don't tolerate cyberbullying at home.
Let your children know they should never, under any circumstances, bully someone. Make the consequences clear.
Keep passwords secret.
Urge your kids not to share passwords or other information that could be used to bully them, or to loan their cell phones or laptops.
Encourage your children to make friends
and to help friends look out for each other. Cyberbullies are less likely to target those whom they perceive have strong friendships. If a victim has friends who rally around him or her, the bullying usually stops.
Get help from technology.
Turn on the safety features available in most programs and services.
If your child is a victim of online bullying, there are a number of escalating steps you can take, says Nancy E. Willard, author of the book Cyberbullying and Cyberthreats: Responding to the challenge of online social cruelty, threats, and distress.
Identify and block.
First, ask your child not to respond or retaliate, no matter how tempting it may be to "fight back." If you can identify who's cyberbullying your child, block any further communications. In your instant message program go to People or Friends in the main menu and choose Block User or Remove Friend, for instance. In your email program, add the offending email address to your blacklist. For assistance in online sleuthing, contact WiredSafety.org, whose trained volunteers can also help you try to track down who's behind the online harassment.
Set boundaries.
You, not your kids, should also contact the bully (or bullies) and demand the offending behavior stop. If you don't know their real identity, send an email or IM. Warn them that you will contact their parents or school, too, if the behavior continues.
File a complaint.
Most cyberbullying behavior-harassment, threats, invasion of privacy, stalking-are violations of a web site or Internet service provider's "terms of service." You can file a complaint with the service and that could lead to the suspension or termination of the cyberbully's (or his or her parents') Internet access.
Contact the school.
If you know the bully attends the same school as your child, teachers and administrators might be able to help. Keep in mind, however, that due to free speech rights, schools often have little leverage over what goes on outside the classroom. Some schools are incorporating anti-cyberbullying terms into students' online access agreements, so if the bully contacted your child from a school computer, he or she could be in big trouble. Make sure to report the incident either way.
Send a certified letter.
If you've done all you can and the bullying hasn't stopped, send the child's parents a certified "cease and desist" letter. Along with the letter, include computer print-outs of the bullying behavior, such as emails or IM transcripts. Ask the parents to step in and put a stop to the cyberbullying. Willard, who is also a lawyer and director of the Center for Safe and Responsible Internet Use, says certifying the letter proves the parents are aware of their child's behavior and can be held responsible if it still doesn't stop.
Call an Attorney.
In the worst case scenario, a lawyer can help you consider filing a civil suit against bullies and/or their parents for defamation, harassment or other causes. Sometimes the threat of a suit is enough to dissuade cyberbullies.
Contact the local police.
If there's any evidence that the cyberbully's tactics include criminal actions, such as hate crimes, physical threats or talk of brandishing weapons at school, contact your local police immediately. Cyberbullies who post surreptitious locker-room photos of their victims online can also be brought up on charges of child pornography. Make sure to print examples of the offending behavior and pass it on to the police. The police can use your complaint to gather any other admissible evidence from your child's computer, if need be.
Talk with your kids about what's acceptable.
Anne Collier, editor of NetFamilyNews.org, an email newsletter about online safety for kids, says to truly stop cyberbullying, however, you have to first know what's happening when your kids are online. Kids are often reluctant to tell parents about cyberbullying or anything else that goes on online for fear parents will only make things worse. Others feel that what they do on the Internet is "private." Williard says that nothing could be further from the truth: "Kids need to know that the Internet is a public space and need to treat it as such."
Willard suggests that you get to know your child's screen names and email addresses and don't hesitate to "Google" (or search) for your kid's online identities. She also says parents should be up front-so tell your kids you'll be checking up on them periodically. And communicate with your kid's friends' parents, she says. Setting expectations not just for your child but everyone else can avoid future problems.
"It takes a digital village to raise a child, these days," she says.
Collier adds that you can draft an "acceptable use policy" or contract for the home computer or other text-messaging devices as well. The policy should address every aspect of venturing into cyberspace, including how long your children will stay online each day. Or what web sites, messaging services and chat rooms are acceptable destinations. Also discuss what personal information they can share online, including photos. "Ask your child, 'What will you do if…?' and then write mutually acceptable answers into the contract," Collier advises. A signed promise to be kind to others online and to report cyberbullying (of themselves or others) could go a long way towards preventing problems before they start.
For more information about Cyberbullying and what to do, visit:
http://www.symantec.com/norton/familyresources/resources.jsp?title=ar_deal_with_cyberbullies
Or
http://www.microsoft.com/protect/parents/social/griefers.aspx
Talk with your kids about cyberbullying.
Ask your kids what they're doing online and encourage them to report bullying to you. Promise that you will take action on their behalf and explain what you will do. Reassure them that you won't curtail their phone or computer privileges.
Keep the family computer in a central location.
If your kids play video games, keep Internet-connected game consoles in a central location also. Teenagers have so many ways to access the Internet that putting the computer in a central spot isn't always effective. With older kids, it's especially important to have frank discussions.
Look for signs of online bullying.
For example, getting upset when online or a reluctance to go to school.
Don't tolerate cyberbullying at home.
Let your children know they should never, under any circumstances, bully someone. Make the consequences clear.
Keep passwords secret.
Urge your kids not to share passwords or other information that could be used to bully them, or to loan their cell phones or laptops.
Encourage your children to make friends
and to help friends look out for each other. Cyberbullies are less likely to target those whom they perceive have strong friendships. If a victim has friends who rally around him or her, the bullying usually stops.
Get help from technology.
Turn on the safety features available in most programs and services.
If your child is a victim of online bullying, there are a number of escalating steps you can take, says Nancy E. Willard, author of the book Cyberbullying and Cyberthreats: Responding to the challenge of online social cruelty, threats, and distress.
Identify and block.
First, ask your child not to respond or retaliate, no matter how tempting it may be to "fight back." If you can identify who's cyberbullying your child, block any further communications. In your instant message program go to People or Friends in the main menu and choose Block User or Remove Friend, for instance. In your email program, add the offending email address to your blacklist. For assistance in online sleuthing, contact WiredSafety.org, whose trained volunteers can also help you try to track down who's behind the online harassment.
Set boundaries.
You, not your kids, should also contact the bully (or bullies) and demand the offending behavior stop. If you don't know their real identity, send an email or IM. Warn them that you will contact their parents or school, too, if the behavior continues.
File a complaint.
Most cyberbullying behavior-harassment, threats, invasion of privacy, stalking-are violations of a web site or Internet service provider's "terms of service." You can file a complaint with the service and that could lead to the suspension or termination of the cyberbully's (or his or her parents') Internet access.
Contact the school.
If you know the bully attends the same school as your child, teachers and administrators might be able to help. Keep in mind, however, that due to free speech rights, schools often have little leverage over what goes on outside the classroom. Some schools are incorporating anti-cyberbullying terms into students' online access agreements, so if the bully contacted your child from a school computer, he or she could be in big trouble. Make sure to report the incident either way.
Send a certified letter.
If you've done all you can and the bullying hasn't stopped, send the child's parents a certified "cease and desist" letter. Along with the letter, include computer print-outs of the bullying behavior, such as emails or IM transcripts. Ask the parents to step in and put a stop to the cyberbullying. Willard, who is also a lawyer and director of the Center for Safe and Responsible Internet Use, says certifying the letter proves the parents are aware of their child's behavior and can be held responsible if it still doesn't stop.
Call an Attorney.
In the worst case scenario, a lawyer can help you consider filing a civil suit against bullies and/or their parents for defamation, harassment or other causes. Sometimes the threat of a suit is enough to dissuade cyberbullies.
Contact the local police.
If there's any evidence that the cyberbully's tactics include criminal actions, such as hate crimes, physical threats or talk of brandishing weapons at school, contact your local police immediately. Cyberbullies who post surreptitious locker-room photos of their victims online can also be brought up on charges of child pornography. Make sure to print examples of the offending behavior and pass it on to the police. The police can use your complaint to gather any other admissible evidence from your child's computer, if need be.
Talk with your kids about what's acceptable.
Anne Collier, editor of NetFamilyNews.org, an email newsletter about online safety for kids, says to truly stop cyberbullying, however, you have to first know what's happening when your kids are online. Kids are often reluctant to tell parents about cyberbullying or anything else that goes on online for fear parents will only make things worse. Others feel that what they do on the Internet is "private." Williard says that nothing could be further from the truth: "Kids need to know that the Internet is a public space and need to treat it as such."
Willard suggests that you get to know your child's screen names and email addresses and don't hesitate to "Google" (or search) for your kid's online identities. She also says parents should be up front-so tell your kids you'll be checking up on them periodically. And communicate with your kid's friends' parents, she says. Setting expectations not just for your child but everyone else can avoid future problems.
"It takes a digital village to raise a child, these days," she says.
Collier adds that you can draft an "acceptable use policy" or contract for the home computer or other text-messaging devices as well. The policy should address every aspect of venturing into cyberspace, including how long your children will stay online each day. Or what web sites, messaging services and chat rooms are acceptable destinations. Also discuss what personal information they can share online, including photos. "Ask your child, 'What will you do if…?' and then write mutually acceptable answers into the contract," Collier advises. A signed promise to be kind to others online and to report cyberbullying (of themselves or others) could go a long way towards preventing problems before they start.
For more information about Cyberbullying and what to do, visit:
http://www.symantec.com/norton/familyresources/resources.jsp?title=ar_deal_with_cyberbullies
Or
http://www.microsoft.com/protect/parents/social/griefers.aspx
Thursday, December 10, 2009
In addition to Child Identification, we here at Ident-A-Kid are concerned with your child’s health and safety during the winter season. Below are some valuable tips from the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) on how to keep your children safe and warm.
What to Wear
• Dress infants and children warmly for outdoor activities. Several thin layers will keep them dry and warm. Clothing for children should consist of thermal long johns, turtlenecks, one or two shirts, pants, sweater, coat, warm socks, boots, gloves or mittens, and a hat.
• The rule of thumb for older babies and young children is to dress them in one more layer of clothing than an adult would wear in the same conditions.
• Blankets, quilts, pillows, sheepskins and other loose bedding may contribute to Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) and should be kept out of an infant’s sleeping environment. Sleep clothing like one-piece sleepers is preferred.
• If a blanket must be used to keep a sleeping infant warm, it should be tucked in around the crib mattress, reaching only as far as your baby’s chest, so the infant's face is less likely to become covered by bedding.
Hypothermia
• Hypothermia develops when a child's temperature falls below normal due to exposure to cold. It often happens when a youngster is playing outdoors in extremely cold weather without wearing proper clothing or when clothes get wet.
• As hypothermia sets in, the child may shiver and become lethargic and clumsy. His speech may become slurred and his body temperature will decline.
• If you suspect your child is hypothermic, call 911 at once. Until help arrives, take the child indoors, remove any wet clothing, and wrap him in blankets or warm clothes.
Frostbite
• Frostbite happens when the skin and outer tissues become frozen. This condition tends to happen on extremities like the fingers, toes, ears and nose. They may become pale, gray and blistered. At the same time, the child may complain that her skin burns or has become numb.
• If frostbite occurs, bring the child indoors and place the frostbitten parts of her body in warm(not hot) water. 104° Fahrenheit (about the temperature of most hot tubs) is recommended. Warm washcloths may be applied to frostbitten nose, ears and lips.
• Do not rub the frozen areas.
• After a few minutes, dry and cover him with clothing or blankets. Give him something warm to drink.
• If the numbness continues for more than a few minutes, call your doctor.
Winter Health
• If your child suffers from winter nosebleeds, try using a cold air humidifier in the child's room at night. Saline nose drops may help keep tissues moist. If bleeding is severe or recurrent, consult your pediatrician.
• Many pediatricians feel that bathing two or three times a week is enough for an infant’s first year. More frequent baths may dry out the skin, especially during the winter.
• Cold weather does not cause colds or flu. But the viruses that cause colds and flu tend to be more common in the winter, when children are in school and are in closer contact with each other. Frequent hand washing and teaching your child to sneeze or cough into the bend of her elbow may help reduce the spread of colds and flu.
• Children between 6 months and 18 years of age should get the influenza vaccine to reduce their risk of catching the flu.
Winter Sports and Activities
Set reasonable time limits on outdoor play to prevent frostbite. Have children come inside periodically to warm up.
Ice Skating
• Allow children to skate only on approved surfaces. Check for signs posted by local police or recreation departments, or call your local police department to find out which areas have been approved.
• Advise your child to: skate in the same direction as the crowd; avoid darting across the ice; never skate alone; not chew gum or eat candy while skating.
• Consider having your child wear a helmet while ice skating.
Sledding
• Keep sledders away from motor vehicles.
• Children should be supervised while sledding.
• Keep young children separated from older children.
• Sledding feet first or sitting up, instead of lying down head-first, may prevent head injuries.
• Consider having your child wear a helmet while sledding.
• Use steerable sleds, not snow disks or inner tubes.
• Sleds should be structurally sound and free of sharp edges and splinters, and the steering mechanism should be well lubricated.
• Sled slopes should be free of obstructions like trees or fences, be covered in snow not ice, not be too steep (slope of less than 30ยบ), and end with a flat runoff.
• Avoid sledding in crowded areas.
Snow Skiing and Snowboarding
• Children should be taught to ski or snowboard by a qualified instructor in a program designed for children.
• Never ski or snowboard alone.
• Young children should always be supervised by an adult. Older children’s need for adult supervision depends on their maturity and skill. If older children are not with an adult, they should always at least be accompanied by a friend.
• The AAP recommends that children under age 7 not snowboard.
• Consider wearing a helmet.
• Equipment should fit the child. Skiers should wear safety bindings that are adjusted at least every year. Snowboarders should wear gloves with built-in wrist guards.
• Slopes should fit the ability and experience of the skier or snowboarder. Avoid crowded slopes.
• Avoid skiing in areas with trees and other obstacles.
Snowmobiling
• The AAP recommends that children under age 16 not operate snowmobiles and that children under age 6 never ride on snowmobiles.
• Do not use a snowmobile to pull a sled or skiers.
• Wear goggles and a safety helmet approved for use on motorized vehicles like motorcycles.
• Travel at safe speeds.
• Never use alcohol or other drugs before or during snowmobiling.
• Never snowmobile alone or at night.
• Stay on marked trails, away from roads, water, railroads and pedestrians.
Sun Protection
The sun’s rays can still cause sunburn in the winter, especially when they reflect off snow. Make sure to cover your child’s exposed skin with sunscreen.
Fire Protection
Winter is a time when household fires occur. It is a good time to remember to: .
• Buy and install smoke alarms on every floor of your home
• Test smoke alarms monthly
• Practice fire drills with your children
For more information about weather safety and child health, visit www.aap.org
What to Wear
• Dress infants and children warmly for outdoor activities. Several thin layers will keep them dry and warm. Clothing for children should consist of thermal long johns, turtlenecks, one or two shirts, pants, sweater, coat, warm socks, boots, gloves or mittens, and a hat.
• The rule of thumb for older babies and young children is to dress them in one more layer of clothing than an adult would wear in the same conditions.
• Blankets, quilts, pillows, sheepskins and other loose bedding may contribute to Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) and should be kept out of an infant’s sleeping environment. Sleep clothing like one-piece sleepers is preferred.
• If a blanket must be used to keep a sleeping infant warm, it should be tucked in around the crib mattress, reaching only as far as your baby’s chest, so the infant's face is less likely to become covered by bedding.
Hypothermia
• Hypothermia develops when a child's temperature falls below normal due to exposure to cold. It often happens when a youngster is playing outdoors in extremely cold weather without wearing proper clothing or when clothes get wet.
• As hypothermia sets in, the child may shiver and become lethargic and clumsy. His speech may become slurred and his body temperature will decline.
• If you suspect your child is hypothermic, call 911 at once. Until help arrives, take the child indoors, remove any wet clothing, and wrap him in blankets or warm clothes.
Frostbite
• Frostbite happens when the skin and outer tissues become frozen. This condition tends to happen on extremities like the fingers, toes, ears and nose. They may become pale, gray and blistered. At the same time, the child may complain that her skin burns or has become numb.
• If frostbite occurs, bring the child indoors and place the frostbitten parts of her body in warm(not hot) water. 104° Fahrenheit (about the temperature of most hot tubs) is recommended. Warm washcloths may be applied to frostbitten nose, ears and lips.
• Do not rub the frozen areas.
• After a few minutes, dry and cover him with clothing or blankets. Give him something warm to drink.
• If the numbness continues for more than a few minutes, call your doctor.
Winter Health
• If your child suffers from winter nosebleeds, try using a cold air humidifier in the child's room at night. Saline nose drops may help keep tissues moist. If bleeding is severe or recurrent, consult your pediatrician.
• Many pediatricians feel that bathing two or three times a week is enough for an infant’s first year. More frequent baths may dry out the skin, especially during the winter.
• Cold weather does not cause colds or flu. But the viruses that cause colds and flu tend to be more common in the winter, when children are in school and are in closer contact with each other. Frequent hand washing and teaching your child to sneeze or cough into the bend of her elbow may help reduce the spread of colds and flu.
• Children between 6 months and 18 years of age should get the influenza vaccine to reduce their risk of catching the flu.
Winter Sports and Activities
Set reasonable time limits on outdoor play to prevent frostbite. Have children come inside periodically to warm up.
Ice Skating
• Allow children to skate only on approved surfaces. Check for signs posted by local police or recreation departments, or call your local police department to find out which areas have been approved.
• Advise your child to: skate in the same direction as the crowd; avoid darting across the ice; never skate alone; not chew gum or eat candy while skating.
• Consider having your child wear a helmet while ice skating.
Sledding
• Keep sledders away from motor vehicles.
• Children should be supervised while sledding.
• Keep young children separated from older children.
• Sledding feet first or sitting up, instead of lying down head-first, may prevent head injuries.
• Consider having your child wear a helmet while sledding.
• Use steerable sleds, not snow disks or inner tubes.
• Sleds should be structurally sound and free of sharp edges and splinters, and the steering mechanism should be well lubricated.
• Sled slopes should be free of obstructions like trees or fences, be covered in snow not ice, not be too steep (slope of less than 30ยบ), and end with a flat runoff.
• Avoid sledding in crowded areas.
Snow Skiing and Snowboarding
• Children should be taught to ski or snowboard by a qualified instructor in a program designed for children.
• Never ski or snowboard alone.
• Young children should always be supervised by an adult. Older children’s need for adult supervision depends on their maturity and skill. If older children are not with an adult, they should always at least be accompanied by a friend.
• The AAP recommends that children under age 7 not snowboard.
• Consider wearing a helmet.
• Equipment should fit the child. Skiers should wear safety bindings that are adjusted at least every year. Snowboarders should wear gloves with built-in wrist guards.
• Slopes should fit the ability and experience of the skier or snowboarder. Avoid crowded slopes.
• Avoid skiing in areas with trees and other obstacles.
Snowmobiling
• The AAP recommends that children under age 16 not operate snowmobiles and that children under age 6 never ride on snowmobiles.
• Do not use a snowmobile to pull a sled or skiers.
• Wear goggles and a safety helmet approved for use on motorized vehicles like motorcycles.
• Travel at safe speeds.
• Never use alcohol or other drugs before or during snowmobiling.
• Never snowmobile alone or at night.
• Stay on marked trails, away from roads, water, railroads and pedestrians.
Sun Protection
The sun’s rays can still cause sunburn in the winter, especially when they reflect off snow. Make sure to cover your child’s exposed skin with sunscreen.
Fire Protection
Winter is a time when household fires occur. It is a good time to remember to: .
• Buy and install smoke alarms on every floor of your home
• Test smoke alarms monthly
• Practice fire drills with your children
For more information about weather safety and child health, visit www.aap.org
Friday, December 4, 2009
Christmas Safety Tips
In addition to Child Identification, we here at Ident-A-Kid are concerned with your child’s safety during the holidays. Below are some safety tips for the holidays from the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission for you and your family.
General Christmas Safety Tips
• Make sure Christmas trees are well anchored and watered so they do not become a fire hazard.
• Keep all breakable Christmas ornaments, electrical extensions and burning objects (candles, incense and potpourri pots) out of small children’s reach.
• Make sure your fireplace is screened and all trees, presents, and children are kept away from fire.
• When wrapping presents keep scissors out of children’s hands.
• Make sure infants and toddlers don’t play with ribbon.
• When involving children in holiday baking make sure adults handle all of the hot items.
• While shopping never let your children out of your sight.
• If your child is lost in a mall or department store, make sure you have your child’s Ident-A-Kid card available and demand that the store take appropriate action.
• Follow all age guidelines on toys and do not deviate.
• Teach children not to succumb to temptation of toys or candy in a shopping environment.
• Request an escort back to your car when you are finished shopping at night.
• Never leave your children unattended in a car.
• Create well-supervised activities for children during Christmas break.
Toy Safety Tips for Holiday Shoppers
• Select toys to suit the age, abilities, skills and interest level of the intended child.
• For infants, toddlers and all children who still mouth objects, avoid toys with small parts that could pose a fatal choking hazard.
• Look for sturdy construction, such as tightly secured eyes, noses and other potential small parts.
• For all children under age 8, avoid toys that have sharp edges and points.
• Do not purchase electric toys with heating elements for children under age 8.
• Be a label reader. Look for labels that give age recommendations and use that information as a guide.
• Check instructions for clarity. They should be clear to you, and when appropriate, to the child.
• Immediately discard plastic wrappings on toys, which can cause suffocation, before they become deadly playthings
For more information about safety during the holidays, visit http://www.cpsc.gov/
General Christmas Safety Tips
• Make sure Christmas trees are well anchored and watered so they do not become a fire hazard.
• Keep all breakable Christmas ornaments, electrical extensions and burning objects (candles, incense and potpourri pots) out of small children’s reach.
• Make sure your fireplace is screened and all trees, presents, and children are kept away from fire.
• When wrapping presents keep scissors out of children’s hands.
• Make sure infants and toddlers don’t play with ribbon.
• When involving children in holiday baking make sure adults handle all of the hot items.
• While shopping never let your children out of your sight.
• If your child is lost in a mall or department store, make sure you have your child’s Ident-A-Kid card available and demand that the store take appropriate action.
• Follow all age guidelines on toys and do not deviate.
• Teach children not to succumb to temptation of toys or candy in a shopping environment.
• Request an escort back to your car when you are finished shopping at night.
• Never leave your children unattended in a car.
• Create well-supervised activities for children during Christmas break.
Toy Safety Tips for Holiday Shoppers
• Select toys to suit the age, abilities, skills and interest level of the intended child.
• For infants, toddlers and all children who still mouth objects, avoid toys with small parts that could pose a fatal choking hazard.
• Look for sturdy construction, such as tightly secured eyes, noses and other potential small parts.
• For all children under age 8, avoid toys that have sharp edges and points.
• Do not purchase electric toys with heating elements for children under age 8.
• Be a label reader. Look for labels that give age recommendations and use that information as a guide.
• Check instructions for clarity. They should be clear to you, and when appropriate, to the child.
• Immediately discard plastic wrappings on toys, which can cause suffocation, before they become deadly playthings
For more information about safety during the holidays, visit http://www.cpsc.gov/
Friday, November 20, 2009
What to Do When Your Child is Choking
In addition to Child Identification, we here at Ident-A-Kid are concerned with your child’s physical well-being. Children are known for putting things in their mouths that are too small and can block the airway. Due to this, you and your family should be aware of some general CPR techniques. Below is some information provided by the American Heart Association about how to tell when your child is choking and what you should do.
Signs of Choking
Choking occurs when something blocks the airway. When the airway is completely blocked, the child cannot breathe. Choking can be a frightening emergency. But if you act quickly, you can help the child breathe.
If the child can speak or cough loudly, the child's airway is only partly blocked. You should not try to open the airway. If you are worried about the child's breathing, phone 9-1-1.
Signs of choking in the child with a completely blocked airway are
• The child suddenly begins to cough, gag or have high-pitched, noisy breathing
• An older child may make the choking sign (holding the neck with one or both
hands)
• The child has bluish lips or skin
Actions to Relieve Choking in a Child
When a child is choking and can't breathe or speak, you must give abdominal thrusts (the Heimlich maneuver). The Heimlich maneuver pushes air from the child's lungs like a cough. This can help remove the blocking object. You should give abdominal thrusts until the object is forced out or the victim becomes unresponsive.
1. If you think a child is choking, ask the child "Are you choking?" If he
nods, tell him you are going to help.
2. Kneel or stand firmly behind him and wrap your arms around him so that your
hands are in front.
3. Make a fist with one hand.
4. Put the thumb side of your fist slightly above the navel (belly button) and
well below the breastbone.
5. Grasp the fist with your other hand and give quick upward thrusts into his
abdomen.
6. Give thrusts until the object is forced out and he can breathe, cough, or
talk or until he stops responding.
If the choking is not relieved, the child will become unresponsive. When the child becomes unresponsive, shout for help, lower the child to the ground, and start CPR. If someone else is present, send that person to phone 9-1-1 while you start CPR.
The steps of CPR of the child who has become unresponsive after choking are the same, with one addition.
1. Yell for help. If someone comes, send that person to phone your emergency
response number (or 911) and get the AED if available.
2. Lower the victim to the ground, faceup. If you are alone with the child
victim, start the steps of CPR.
3. Every time you open the airway to give breaths, open the victim's mouth wide
and look for the object. If you see an object, remove it with your
fingers. If you do not see an object, keep giving sets of 30 compressions
and two breaths until an AED arrives, the victim starts to move, or trained
help takes over.
4. After about five cycles or two minutes, if you are alone, leave the child
victim to call your emergency response number (or 911) and get the AED if
available.
Chest compressions may force the object out. If you are alone with the child and these steps don't work after about one minute, phone 9-1-1.
Reviewed/Updated: 10/28/2008
For more information, visit http://www.americanheart.org/presenter.jhtml?identifier=3025002 or www.americanheart.org
Signs of Choking
Choking occurs when something blocks the airway. When the airway is completely blocked, the child cannot breathe. Choking can be a frightening emergency. But if you act quickly, you can help the child breathe.
If the child can speak or cough loudly, the child's airway is only partly blocked. You should not try to open the airway. If you are worried about the child's breathing, phone 9-1-1.
Signs of choking in the child with a completely blocked airway are
• The child suddenly begins to cough, gag or have high-pitched, noisy breathing
• An older child may make the choking sign (holding the neck with one or both
hands)
• The child has bluish lips or skin
Actions to Relieve Choking in a Child
When a child is choking and can't breathe or speak, you must give abdominal thrusts (the Heimlich maneuver). The Heimlich maneuver pushes air from the child's lungs like a cough. This can help remove the blocking object. You should give abdominal thrusts until the object is forced out or the victim becomes unresponsive.
1. If you think a child is choking, ask the child "Are you choking?" If he
nods, tell him you are going to help.
2. Kneel or stand firmly behind him and wrap your arms around him so that your
hands are in front.
3. Make a fist with one hand.
4. Put the thumb side of your fist slightly above the navel (belly button) and
well below the breastbone.
5. Grasp the fist with your other hand and give quick upward thrusts into his
abdomen.
6. Give thrusts until the object is forced out and he can breathe, cough, or
talk or until he stops responding.
If the choking is not relieved, the child will become unresponsive. When the child becomes unresponsive, shout for help, lower the child to the ground, and start CPR. If someone else is present, send that person to phone 9-1-1 while you start CPR.
The steps of CPR of the child who has become unresponsive after choking are the same, with one addition.
1. Yell for help. If someone comes, send that person to phone your emergency
response number (or 911) and get the AED if available.
2. Lower the victim to the ground, faceup. If you are alone with the child
victim, start the steps of CPR.
3. Every time you open the airway to give breaths, open the victim's mouth wide
and look for the object. If you see an object, remove it with your
fingers. If you do not see an object, keep giving sets of 30 compressions
and two breaths until an AED arrives, the victim starts to move, or trained
help takes over.
4. After about five cycles or two minutes, if you are alone, leave the child
victim to call your emergency response number (or 911) and get the AED if
available.
Chest compressions may force the object out. If you are alone with the child and these steps don't work after about one minute, phone 9-1-1.
Reviewed/Updated: 10/28/2008
For more information, visit http://www.americanheart.org/presenter.jhtml?identifier=3025002 or www.americanheart.org
Thursday, November 12, 2009
In addition to Child Identification, we here at Ident-A-Kid are also concerned with your child’s physical and emotional well-being. Bullies can seriously disrupt a child’s emotional and psychological wellness. A good way to guard against these disruptions is to simply be aware that bullying is a serious problem and not just something to be cast aside as normal child behavior. Below is a good description of bullying, why kids bully, signs that your child is being bullied, and some advice to give your children about how to deal with bullies or avoid bullies provided by kidshealth.org.
What Is Bullying?
Most kids have been teased by a sibling or a friend at some point. And it's not usually harmful when done in a playful, friendly, and mutual way, and both kids find it funny. But when teasing becomes hurtful, unkind, and constant, it crosses the line into bullying and needs to stop.
Bullying is intentional tormenting in physical, verbal, or psychological ways. It can range from hitting, shoving, name-calling, threats, and mocking to extorting money and treasured possessions. Some kids bully by shunning others and spreading rumors about them. Others use email, chat rooms, instant messages, social networking websites, and text messages to taunt others or hurt their feelings.
It's important to take bullying seriously and not just brush it off as something that kids have to "tough out." The effects can be serious and affect kids' sense of self-worth and future relationships. In severe cases, bullying has contributed to tragedies, such as school shootings.
Why Do Kids Bully?
Kids bully for a variety of reasons. Sometimes they pick on kids because they need a victim — someone who seems emotionally or physically weaker, or just acts or appears different in some way — to feel more important, popular, or in control. Although some bullies are bigger or stronger than their victims, that's not always the case.
Sometimes kids torment others because that's the way they’ve been treated. They may think their behavior is normal because they come from families or other settings where everyone regularly gets angry, shouts, or calls names. Some popular TV shows even seem to promote meanness — people are "voted off," shunned, or ridiculed for their appearance or lack of talent.
Signs of Bullying
Unless your child tells you about bullying — or has visible bruises or injuries — it can be difficult to figure out if it's happening.
But there are some warning signs. You might notice your child acting differently or seeming anxious, or not eating, sleeping well, or doing the things that he or she usually enjoys. When kids seem moodier or more easily upset than usual, or when they start avoiding certain situations, like taking the bus to school, it may be because of a bully.
If you suspect bullying but your child is reluctant to open up, find opportunities to bring up the issue in a more roundabout way. For instance, you might see a situation on a TV show and use it as a conversation starter, asking "What do you think of this?" or "What do you think that person should have done?" This might lead to questions like: "Have you ever seen this happen?" or "Have you ever experienced this?" You might want to talk about any experiences you or another family member had at that age.
Let your child know that if he or she is being bullied — or sees it happening to someone else — it's important to talk to someone about it, whether it's you, another adult (a teacher, school counselor, or family friend), or a sibling.
Helping Kids
If your child tells you about a bully, focus on offering comfort and support, no matter how upset you are. Kids are often reluctant to tell adults about bullying. They feel embarrassed and ashamed that it's happening. They worry that their parents will be disappointed.
Sometimes kids feel like it's their own fault, that if they looked or acted differently it wouldn't be happening. Sometimes they're scared that if the bully finds out that they told, it will get worse. Others are worried that their parents won't believe them or do anything about it. Or kids worry that their parents will urge them to fight back when they're scared to.
Praise your child for being brave enough to talk about it. Remind your child that he or she isn't alone — a lot of people get bullied at some point. Emphasize that it's the bully who is behaving badly — not your child. Reassure your child that you will figure out what to do about it together.
Sometimes an older sibling or friend can help deal with the situation. It may help your daughter to hear how the older sister she idolizes was teased about her braces and how she dealt with it. An older sibling or friend may also be able to give you some perspective on what's happening at school, or wherever the bullying is happening, and help you figure out the best solution.
Take it seriously if your hear that the bullying will get worse if the bully finds out that your child told. Sometimes it's useful to approach the bully's parents. In other cases, teachers or counselors are the best ones to contact first. If you've tried those methods and still want to speak to the bullying child's parents, it's best to do so in a context where a school official, such as a counselor, can mediate.
Many states have bullying laws and policies. Find out about the laws in your community. In certain cases, if you have serious concerns about your child's safety, you may need to contact legal authorities.
Advice for Kids
The key to helping kids is providing strategies that deal with bullying on an everyday basis and also help restore their self-esteem and regain a sense of dignity.
It may be tempting to tell a kid to fight back. After all, you're angry that your child is suffering and maybe you were told to "stand up for yourself" when you were young. And you may worry that your child will continue to suffer at the hands of the bully.
But it's important to advise kids not to respond to bullying by fighting or bullying back. It can quickly escalate into violence, trouble, and someone getting injured. Instead, it's best to walk away from the situation, hang out with others, and tell an adult.
Here are some other strategies to discuss with kids that can help improve the situation and make them feel better:
Avoid the bully and use the buddy system. Use a different bathroom if a bully is nearby and don't go to your locker when there is nobody around. Make sure you have someone with you so that you're not alone with the bully. Buddy up with a friend on the bus, in the hallways, or at recess — wherever the bully is. Offer to do the same for a friend.
Hold the anger. It's natural to get upset by the bully, but that's what bullies thrive on. It makes them feel more powerful. Practice not reacting by crying or looking red or upset. It takes a lot of practice, but it's a useful skill for keeping off of a bully's radar. Sometimes kids find it useful to practice "cool down" strategies such as counting to 10, writing down their angry words, taking deep breaths or walking away. Sometimes the best thing to do is to teach kids to wear a "poker face" until they are clear of any danger (smiling or laughing may provoke the bully).
Act brave, walk away, and ignore the bully. Firmly and clearly tell the bully to stop, then walk away. Practice ways to ignore the hurtful remarks, like acting uninterested or texting someone on your cell phone. By ignoring the bully, you're showing that you don't care. Eventually, the bully will probably get bored with trying to bother you.
Tell an adult. Teachers, principals, parents, and lunchroom personnel at school can all help stop bullying.
Talk about it. Talk to someone you trust, such as a guidance counselor, teacher, sibling, or friend. They may offer some helpful suggestions, and even if they can't fix the situation, it may help you feel a little less alone.
Remove the incentives. If the bully is demanding your lunch money, start bringing your lunch. If he's trying to get your music player, don't bring it to school.
Reaching Out
At home you can lessen the impact of the bullying. Encourage your kids to get together with friends that help build their confidence. Help them meet other kids by joining clubs or sports programs. And find activities that can help a child feel confident and strong. Maybe it's a self-defense class like karate or a movement or other gym class.
And just remember: as upsetting as bullying can be for you and your family, lots of people and resources are available to help.
To learn more about child safety and bullying, visit kidshealth.org or http://kidshealth.org/parent/emotions/behavior/bullies.html#
What Is Bullying?
Most kids have been teased by a sibling or a friend at some point. And it's not usually harmful when done in a playful, friendly, and mutual way, and both kids find it funny. But when teasing becomes hurtful, unkind, and constant, it crosses the line into bullying and needs to stop.
Bullying is intentional tormenting in physical, verbal, or psychological ways. It can range from hitting, shoving, name-calling, threats, and mocking to extorting money and treasured possessions. Some kids bully by shunning others and spreading rumors about them. Others use email, chat rooms, instant messages, social networking websites, and text messages to taunt others or hurt their feelings.
It's important to take bullying seriously and not just brush it off as something that kids have to "tough out." The effects can be serious and affect kids' sense of self-worth and future relationships. In severe cases, bullying has contributed to tragedies, such as school shootings.
Why Do Kids Bully?
Kids bully for a variety of reasons. Sometimes they pick on kids because they need a victim — someone who seems emotionally or physically weaker, or just acts or appears different in some way — to feel more important, popular, or in control. Although some bullies are bigger or stronger than their victims, that's not always the case.
Sometimes kids torment others because that's the way they’ve been treated. They may think their behavior is normal because they come from families or other settings where everyone regularly gets angry, shouts, or calls names. Some popular TV shows even seem to promote meanness — people are "voted off," shunned, or ridiculed for their appearance or lack of talent.
Signs of Bullying
Unless your child tells you about bullying — or has visible bruises or injuries — it can be difficult to figure out if it's happening.
But there are some warning signs. You might notice your child acting differently or seeming anxious, or not eating, sleeping well, or doing the things that he or she usually enjoys. When kids seem moodier or more easily upset than usual, or when they start avoiding certain situations, like taking the bus to school, it may be because of a bully.
If you suspect bullying but your child is reluctant to open up, find opportunities to bring up the issue in a more roundabout way. For instance, you might see a situation on a TV show and use it as a conversation starter, asking "What do you think of this?" or "What do you think that person should have done?" This might lead to questions like: "Have you ever seen this happen?" or "Have you ever experienced this?" You might want to talk about any experiences you or another family member had at that age.
Let your child know that if he or she is being bullied — or sees it happening to someone else — it's important to talk to someone about it, whether it's you, another adult (a teacher, school counselor, or family friend), or a sibling.
Helping Kids
If your child tells you about a bully, focus on offering comfort and support, no matter how upset you are. Kids are often reluctant to tell adults about bullying. They feel embarrassed and ashamed that it's happening. They worry that their parents will be disappointed.
Sometimes kids feel like it's their own fault, that if they looked or acted differently it wouldn't be happening. Sometimes they're scared that if the bully finds out that they told, it will get worse. Others are worried that their parents won't believe them or do anything about it. Or kids worry that their parents will urge them to fight back when they're scared to.
Praise your child for being brave enough to talk about it. Remind your child that he or she isn't alone — a lot of people get bullied at some point. Emphasize that it's the bully who is behaving badly — not your child. Reassure your child that you will figure out what to do about it together.
Sometimes an older sibling or friend can help deal with the situation. It may help your daughter to hear how the older sister she idolizes was teased about her braces and how she dealt with it. An older sibling or friend may also be able to give you some perspective on what's happening at school, or wherever the bullying is happening, and help you figure out the best solution.
Take it seriously if your hear that the bullying will get worse if the bully finds out that your child told. Sometimes it's useful to approach the bully's parents. In other cases, teachers or counselors are the best ones to contact first. If you've tried those methods and still want to speak to the bullying child's parents, it's best to do so in a context where a school official, such as a counselor, can mediate.
Many states have bullying laws and policies. Find out about the laws in your community. In certain cases, if you have serious concerns about your child's safety, you may need to contact legal authorities.
Advice for Kids
The key to helping kids is providing strategies that deal with bullying on an everyday basis and also help restore their self-esteem and regain a sense of dignity.
It may be tempting to tell a kid to fight back. After all, you're angry that your child is suffering and maybe you were told to "stand up for yourself" when you were young. And you may worry that your child will continue to suffer at the hands of the bully.
But it's important to advise kids not to respond to bullying by fighting or bullying back. It can quickly escalate into violence, trouble, and someone getting injured. Instead, it's best to walk away from the situation, hang out with others, and tell an adult.
Here are some other strategies to discuss with kids that can help improve the situation and make them feel better:
Avoid the bully and use the buddy system. Use a different bathroom if a bully is nearby and don't go to your locker when there is nobody around. Make sure you have someone with you so that you're not alone with the bully. Buddy up with a friend on the bus, in the hallways, or at recess — wherever the bully is. Offer to do the same for a friend.
Hold the anger. It's natural to get upset by the bully, but that's what bullies thrive on. It makes them feel more powerful. Practice not reacting by crying or looking red or upset. It takes a lot of practice, but it's a useful skill for keeping off of a bully's radar. Sometimes kids find it useful to practice "cool down" strategies such as counting to 10, writing down their angry words, taking deep breaths or walking away. Sometimes the best thing to do is to teach kids to wear a "poker face" until they are clear of any danger (smiling or laughing may provoke the bully).
Act brave, walk away, and ignore the bully. Firmly and clearly tell the bully to stop, then walk away. Practice ways to ignore the hurtful remarks, like acting uninterested or texting someone on your cell phone. By ignoring the bully, you're showing that you don't care. Eventually, the bully will probably get bored with trying to bother you.
Tell an adult. Teachers, principals, parents, and lunchroom personnel at school can all help stop bullying.
Talk about it. Talk to someone you trust, such as a guidance counselor, teacher, sibling, or friend. They may offer some helpful suggestions, and even if they can't fix the situation, it may help you feel a little less alone.
Remove the incentives. If the bully is demanding your lunch money, start bringing your lunch. If he's trying to get your music player, don't bring it to school.
Reaching Out
At home you can lessen the impact of the bullying. Encourage your kids to get together with friends that help build their confidence. Help them meet other kids by joining clubs or sports programs. And find activities that can help a child feel confident and strong. Maybe it's a self-defense class like karate or a movement or other gym class.
And just remember: as upsetting as bullying can be for you and your family, lots of people and resources are available to help.
To learn more about child safety and bullying, visit kidshealth.org or http://kidshealth.org/parent/emotions/behavior/bullies.html#
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